The Esquire

The Esquire adorned San Antonio like a pair of jeans. It was the only real bar on the river (one that the tourists would miss unless they were paying attention and interested enough in shady places). It also boasted the longest bar in Texas, making it, according to a September 28, 2006 Express-News article ("Last Call for the Esquire Tavern"), into Ripley's Believe It or Not (we'll believe it) for being able to hold 5,973 Lone Star longnecks on it's wooden surface. That is a hell of a lot of longnecks. And you know that they were gone by the morning -- or at least their contents were. Sadly, the bar dating back to 1933 closed their doors (ostensibly for renovations -- it's been three years) on the day before the article ran -- a Wednesday of all days (not that it mattered a whole lot there though: People flocked to it like kids to an ice cream truck). A couple of other tidbits from that same article:

• "If they get rid of the wallpaper, I'm moving out of town," Chuck Ramirez, San Antonio native and visual artist, said dramatically. Indeed, the gaudy wallpaper is as much a fixture as is the famous 12-by-5-foot Mahncke Hotel painting fished out of the San Antonio River during the Great Flood of 1921 that hangs proudly above the jukebox.
  
• The Esquire will be closed for at least 18 months for a $1.8 million renovation, which will more than double the square footage and includes gutting the space, remodeling and adding a restaurant downstairs. Plans are to return as a family friendly destination, renamed Tavern Esquire and BBQ House.
  

I remember when I first moved down here in 1999, I got all dressed up (read: slacks and a tucked in button down shirt) for a job interview. It didn't go very well. I don't even remember what the job was or where downtown, but I do remember drowning my sorrows at the Esquire. I stood at the bar with the vaqueros and pioneers and the drunks and had a shot of well tequila and a 16 oz lone star. It just barely broke the two dollar mark, if I remember correctly. I tipped and laid down the change from my twenty and drank until it was gone. Alas, those days are gone (as are the ones of my brother puking under the table years later from the same said tequila while someone distracted the waiter). I never bought a shirt that read, "You got frisked at The Esquire" because I never thought I wouldn't be able to buy one.

Most recently (January 10, 2009), an Express-News article ("Group Backs Plan to Raze Annex") had this to say: "Also Friday, the [Historic and Design Review C]ommission approved conceptual renovation plans for the Esquire Tavern, which dates to 1933 and has long been known as a popular watering hole by the River Walk. Davis Sprinkle, project architect, said the tavern at 151 E. Commerce St. and its features, including its exterior tile and neon sign and elongated wooden bar, would be kept intact but made to look as good as new." As far as I can tell Davis Sprinkle is a part of the Sprinkle Robey Architecture firm, though there is no mention of the project on the website.

I have a bad feeling that the Esquire is kaput for the foreseeable future.